Tom and Ronit Ricoy: January 2005

Tom and Ronit Ricoy

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Ricoy Update No. 6

Thank you, friends, for your e-mails and prayers. After 3 tough weeks in Oaxaca, we’ve made our way to Cancun! Believe it or not, it’s kind of cold – very windy – but the beach is beautiful. (The people we met from Wisconsin are loving the “warm” weather! The people we met from Anaheim, CA are complaining about how “cold” it is!) We are trying to catch up on everything (Tom is taking a class online and was 2 weeks behind, etc) since the last 3 weeks in Oaxaca were very busy (and emotionally and physically draining), but tomorrow is a fun day, and Tom is going to go scuba diving. We’re very thankful to be here, but we’re also thankful we were able to help in Oaxaca.

I’ll catch you up on the last week with Lucy. The end result is that the tests she already had (which needed to be seen by a neurologist) demanded an MRI and that the MRI demanded more tests, and as a result of all that she is now hospitalized. It was a fight at each and every step to get a doctor to see her, but each time a doctor saw her, he/she said it was “urgente” (urgent, emergency) and everything went quickly until we got to the next person and had to fight again. Every day was “hurry up and wait” (from sun-up until after sundown) as we spent hours and hours in doctors’ offices and hospitals and en route in between, but, miraculously, we made progress in days that could have taken months, and we saw God working through it all.

Here’s a summary of our week:

Monday: Morning physical therapy for Lucy. Afternoon appt with neurologist to get the paperwork to go to Mexico City. In the evening, Elpidio (Lucy's dad) ended up in the hospital! They thought he had a blood clot, but it turned out (after an overnight hospital stay and more tests the next day) that he had mistakenly overdosed on a new medicine he had been given for Parkinsons. What a stressful couple of days!

Tuesday: All day bus travel to Mexico City (Tom, me, Lucy, Angelina – Elpidio was still hospitalized and could not go with us). Tom had to carry Lucy on and off the bus and Angelina and I had to help her in the restroom, etc. It was a hard trip for her and physically demanding for those of us who were helping her. When we arrived in Mexico City, Tom’s friends picked us up and took us (since they live on the 4th floor of a building with no elevator) to a fellow church member’s home who graciously housed us. Tom’s friends (whom he had only met twice and had not seen in 4 years), Arturo and Lety and their three boys, were amazing. Tom called and explained the situation and they completely turned their lives upside down to help Lucy and us for two days, driving us all over, making phone calls, and waiting with us. Then to top it all off, they paid for the return trip to Oaxaca. Every time someone said “Gracias,” their gracious response was “No, gracias a Dios.”

Wednesday: 7am to the neurological hospital where the Oaxacan doc had sent us for a 7:30am appointment. Well, it turned out the 7:30am appt was really just an appt to get an appt. We waited most of the morning only to be told that this was a hospital for the uninsured and because Lucy has seguro social, she was not eligible to be there despite the doctor’s official letter, something the Oaxacan doc should have known full-well (and when we called him, he seemed utterly unconcerned that he had sent us on a wild goose chase). We were all very upset that we had made this difficult and expensive trip seemingly for nothing, but I felt strongly that we needed to find a way to get the MRI for which we came. Well, despite our initial upset, it turned out to be very important that we had been sent to Mexico City. Lety and Arturo made phone calls all afternoon and called a doctor friend for help. This friend helped them make contact with another neurologist who agreed to see us after his last patient, as a favor. Doctors work two shifts in Mexico, so our appt was for 8pm, but of course we waited, so after beginning our day with a 7:30am appt, we got out of the last appt around 11pm. This neurologist spent a long time with Lucy and with her studies (though we were missing some important paperwork and studies) and was very concerned that there was a dark spot on her brain. He made very, very clear that this needed IMMEDIATE and ongoing attention and that her parents needed to fight for her to get that attention. The doctor said the MRI was the first and very necessary step, but that there would be a series of tests after that. He gave us a discount when Lety explained Lucy’s situation and helped us find an affordable MRI location.

Thursday: Lety called the MRI office early the next morning and (again miraculously as the wait was usually much longer) we were able to schedule an 11am MRI. During the MRI, we were told we would be unable to get the results until Monday and that we would then have to schedule an appt with a neurologist to have it read. We were very concerned about this and asked if there were any way to fast track it, but we were told no. After the MRI, Adriana, the young woman who worked at the desk, told us to come back at 1:30pm for results! Someone hand-carried the MRI to be developed and called a neurologist in to read it. When we opened the envelope, there were two letters: one was the results, the other was a personal letter for Lucy from Adriana. It quoted Psalm 100 and explained (in Spanish), “Lucy, I don’t know you, but God moved in my heart to write this to you” and she continued with a beautiful and encouraging note for Lucy which made us all cry. This neurologist’s reading suggested neurocisticercosis. We were actually encouraged by this result since we were told this is treatable – though it was necessary that the treatment be swift since the neurocisticercosis is very advanced; it seemed preferable to multiple sclerosis (the first neurologist’s suggested diagnosis) or a brain tumor (something they needed to test for). (The next day’s appointment got us worried again, though.) We hurried to the bus station and just made the 2:30pm bus for Oaxaca, so we got back late Thursday night.

Friday: We were at the Seguro Social at 8am Friday morning to try to get an appt for Lucy, this time with tests and letters marked “urgente.” As always, it was a fight at every step. The neurologist was not in until the afternoon, but another doctor was in. At first the secretary told us the doctor was too busy to talk with us, but I pushed and told her about the tests, etc, so the doctor agreed to see us. When the doc looked at the tests, she actually thanked me for helping them and wrote a letter for the neurologist, again stating “urgente” and told us to come back at 2pm (the neurologist arrived at 3pm and she wanted us to be first). So we took a few hours to run over to Office Depot and buy everything needed to organize their medical records (their lack of organization was causing real problems and it turned out to be a Godsend that I did this before the afternoon appt as the doctor was then able to see things that caused him to take Lucy’s problem very seriously). We came back and the neurologist (initially looking at the “urgente” etter but not at the tests) told us to go see the appointment desk and they would fit us in on Monday. We went and fought with a lady who wanted us to wait until February! Finally we went back to the neurologist himself, who reluctantly agreed to see us when he had time if we waited, so we waited. We got in at about 4:30pm. Once the doctor actually looked at the MRI and at her other tests (including very important tests that Angelina hadn’t found in time to take to Mexico City and ones they didn’t think were important to bring but which I had organized for them and brought anyway) he said she had to be admitted IMMEDIATELY, noting discrepancies and changes between old and new tests. He said she needed to start treatment for the neurocisticercosis, but that the different studies are contradictory and that something more is also going on that has to be immediately addressed. So Lucy was hospitalized and we were there with her until around 7pm. Angelina stayed with her all night.

Saturday: The next day I relieved Angelina and stayed with Lucy, reading to her and helping her during her epileptic convulsions (which are not actually convulsions; her whole body becomes rigid and she cannot move). I got very angry at one nurse (who has no business in the field!) who came in to give Lucy her medicine and got impatient that Lucy couldn’t take her medicine at that exact moment. This nurse had the gall to tell Lucy that if she didn’t cooperate (which she couldn’t do in the middle of a convulsion!) she would stay have to stay in the hospital for months and months and that she’d better start cooperating if she ever wanted out, which of course scared Lucy but didn’t change anything since it was out of her control. It is because these kinds of nurses that Lucy is afraid to be alone in the hospital and that someone needs to stay with her 24-7. Saturday afternoon we had the railings put in which, along with the ramps we made, will help her get around the house when she goes home. Then we left that evening and arrived in Cancun after midnight.

Sunday: Lucy still in the hospital. We’d gotten to Cancun, but they put us on the 4 th floor with no elevator despite my explanations about my knees. Tom’s accident injuries were really bothering him after having carried Lucy on and off buses and up and down many flights of stairs, so I just stayed hostage in the hotel room (at least it was a nice room) until we finally got them to move us. (The restaurant, beach, pool, etc is still down a flight of stairs, though! Not exactly handicapped accessible.)

Monday: Lucy had her major tests begin on Monday, to follow up from the MRI we had had to go to Mexico City for. We do not yet know the results of these tests but hope to have some info soon. We really need to pray for the doctor’s wisdom and attention so that they will properly diagnose and treat Lucy. Meanwhile in Cancun, Tom spent all day (as he also did on Sunday) catching up on schoolwork (for his online class) and I caught up on e-mails and other business.

Tuesday: This morning we went to a timeshare presentation in order to get free scuba diving. I am amazed at how much money people throw away. (We got 5 nights all-inclusive Cancun hotel for $299 per person and upgraded another $99. If you come down here, look for the deals so you don’t throw your money away. We see people spending several times what we spent and they’re not getting much more – just wasting money that could be used for people like Lucy. The last time I was in Cancun, we stayed at an RV campground for $10 per person, but we enjoyed the same beaches, etc as these people who throw their money away.) Tom finished all his make-up school work and is now working on this week’s assignments.

Tomorrow Tom will go scuba diving and I will hang out on the boat, and tomorrow night is our last night in the hotel. The next day we’ll leave Mexico.

We have learned a lot this past week, especially from Lucy and the people around her. In Mexico City, we were really inspired by Arturo and Lety’s amazing attitude. Tom and I agree that they are an example for us and that we want our home and our lives to be available to help others as they do. We also saw little miracle after little miracle, that added up to something very big and important. And we were also reminded that faith and works go together. We needed to pray and have faith, but we also needed to ACT and to fight to make things happen. It’s not good enough to say, “Isn’t that sad?” and to go on with our lives without DOING anything.

In terms of the financial report, Tom put the specifics in Excel and we can send it to anyone who would like it. The summary is this: Our Oaxaca Team/U.P. donated $950. Costs so far have reached $1,596.73 (so $646.73 in the hole.) O bviously, they are going to have more costs in the coming weeks and months as well, so I would say we need to raise at least $1,500 more. So far, there are 5 people have responded to e-mails with offers to help (3 of those people's donations total $350 and we do not yet know the others' amounts), and Tom and I can cover some, but not all, of the difference. There are still a couple of days to donate through U.P. and after that donations can be made through Tecate Mission. (Tom has the Tecate donation information if anyone needs it.) Thank you to the 5 friends who have offered to help with some of the Perez family’s immediate medical expenses and to all of you who are praying for the Perez family. Lucy and her family have a tough road ahead of them.

God is teaching us a lot. We continue to wrestle with what is the right balance with our time and financial resources, for one thing. It’s wonderful to be able to enjoy this week in Cancun and to dream of a nice home (I spend free time drawing and designing the house we hope to build in the future) and I do not think we need to feel guilty about that. At the same time, it’s hard to spend a penny on what is really a luxury when real need is so evident, and it’s hard not to resent the choices we see others make. I really struggled with that when I came back from my year in Guatemala, and I can’t say we’ve got it figured out yet. We both feel like we really need some non-volunteer time this year, especially given some of our own health needs, but we also want to continue to be open to be used when and where God leads. It was very rewarding to be available to meet a need this last week. So that’s one of many issues we are thinking and praying about right now as we are in this very transitional life stage.

We’ll keep you posted! Please keep us posted about everything that is going on in your lives and hearts back home! We miss you!

Sincerely,
Ronit and Tom Ricoy

¶ 10:20 PM

Saturday, January 08, 2005

Ricoy Update No. 5

Happy New Year! Wishing you all a beautiful 2005! We spent Christmas
in Oaxaca City and the New Year in Carrizalillo, in the mountains of
Oaxaca. (In Carrizalillo, we slept on concrete floors in open rooms
just feet away from two large hanging slabs of meat – the bulls that
had been butchered for Albina's wedding celebration! Tom and I used
yoga mats, blankets, and everything we could to soften the sleeping
arrangement for bad backs, and we actually acclimated to the smell of
meat. However, I was happy to have the stuff finally cooked after
several days – bit by bit – and happy to get back to a soft bed in
Oaxaca City.) Looking around us and hearing the heart-wrenching
tsunami news, we are fully aware of how much we have to be thankful
for in this New Year and how much we can and should give to help those
in need.

In order to explain much of what we have done, are doing and will be
doing over the next week, I need to introduce you to the Perez family
– and then to the serious health problems they are faced with (Elpidio
with Parkinsons and going deaf, Lucy having very recently lost the
ability to walk and being tested for MS as well as dealing with
epilepsy and rheumatoid arthritis at the young age of 29, Rebeca
dealing with glandular problems, Angelina with a bad back but doing
the physically hard work of caring for Lucy) .

Elpidio Perez is a Zapoteco (this is one of the many people groups
indigenous to Oaxaca state) pastor and missionary. He and his wife,
Angelina, and their three adult daughters, twins (29) Lucy and Miriam
and younger sister (26) Rebeca live and work in Oaxaca City. (We flew
Elpidio and Angelina up for our wedding in Rosarito, so some of you
may have met them.) They have spent their lives serving other people
and now need some help.

Tom first visited the Perez family with a group from Tecate Mission
about five years ago. Elpidio has a real heart for the indigenous
Mixteco and Zapoteco who live in the mountains of Oaxaca and
frequently made trips to those regions to do outreach, encourage the
Christians there and support the individuals and churches who, due to
the landscape, are often isolated from other Christians (and from
doctors and other support). (Elipidio literally shares the gospel
with everyone he meets and is always willing to stop and share or help
someone out. I have honestly never met anyone like him.) Missions
teams visit Oaxaca City from time to time, but no group wanted to go
to the mountains because it was time-consuming and difficult. Tom was
the first outsider to bring a group and in order to reach
Carrizalillo, they had to drive six hours, then hike two hours after
the road ended. Mind you, this is not just any hike, the elevation is
about 4,000 feet and the hills are steep and every step is up or down
– there is little level ground. He has returned to the mountains
three times since. Fortunately for me, they have built a road since
his last trip (they call it a terrazeria, because it is really more of
a terrace along the steep mountainside, and there was a lot of praying
going on while we were driving there!) that limits the hike to a
10-minute climb up a very steep hill.

Tom brought the first UP team (University Praise, or UP, our home
church) to Carrizalillo in 2002. (His trip corresponded with one of my
trips to Guatemala, so I did not go, and I would never have made the
hike, pre-terrazeria, anyway.) He and Debbie Phares co-led another UP
team which came to Oaxaca for 12 days this Dec/Jan. Four of the six
team members were returning (Debbie and Kyle came with Tom in 2002 and
Debbie led another 2003 trip on which Andrea came… only Victor and I
were first-timers in Oaxaca).

The original plan, in the works for half a year, was a 3-day
conference that would bring together the various isolated Christians
and churches. Tom and Elpidio and Isiasis (the pastor in
Carrizalillo) made plans for many months and things seemed to be
well-organized on both ends. Then in November they told Tom that it
was not going to work out. Isiasis had underestimated the work
involved in his sister's wedding and forgotten to factor in the timing
of some local agricultural work and how that would affect people's
availability – basically bad planning on the Mexico end of things.
The conference was the team's original purpose, but they already had
their plane tickets and the wheelchairs we were planning to deliver,
so we came anyway, and we just made ourselves available to help in any
way possible. We all learned a lot about being FLEXIBLE because
Elpidio's huge heart and tendency to over commit had us changing plans
daily and the team leaders laid down the law about giving the team
some down town plus two free days at the end.

At first, I struggled with the validity of our "mission" with the
conference cancelled (apart from delivering wheelchairs, which we
didn't need six people to do). However, God really worked through and
in all of us during this time. The people here were very encouraged
to see RETURNING faces, people who cared about them (Tom having
visited Oaxaca six times and Carrizalillo four times, Debbie on her
third visit, Andrea and Kyle on their second). Debbie is taking on an
exciting project of searching out matching funds (dollar to peso) to
help them build a permanent structure for a church in Carrizalillo,
and Kyle is going to go home and look for educational scholarships.
Victor really connected with the people and, as a freshman in college,
this trip was very instrumental in confirming his interest in
linguistics and Bible translation. Andrea had some great women's and
children's activities. I helped out wherever I could but initially
felt somewhat useless because of my physical limitations (and a burden
when others had to help me continually with stairs, etc). However, it
turned out to be my past and present physical pain and experiences
that were my biggest contributions as this brought sensitivity to the
physical needs of people in Oaxaca, Carrizalillo and along the way.

The group was involved in various projects and we were honored to
attend the wedding of Isiasis's sister Albina, but I want to focus on
the physical needs, as that is what stands out most to me. I'm going
to share in detail with the hope that you will pray for them, consider
helping these families financially, and that someone out there may
have some helpful insight or information applicable to their medical
needs.

In Oaxaca City: Lucy is 29 years old and has suffered epilepsy since
about age 12. To the best of my understanding, this is her recent
history. About five months ago, she began having vision problems and
got glasses. Then in September 2004 other symptoms became severe and
very shortly she lost the ability to walk as well as other muscle
control, plus her hands began to contort and speaking became more
difficult. She had various blood tests, etc and was diagnosed with
rheumatism, but this does not explain her complete physical condition.
Two doctors asked that she get an MRI in Puebla, but the family did
not pursue it due to the cost of the test and the trip to Puebla and
to a general lack of understanding about its medical necessity. They
also suggested (in addition to, not instead of) physical therapy.
However, as they were trying to get physical therapy through the
Social Security doctors, the wait was several months. Meanwhile,
Lucy's condition has steadily deteriorated.

What we've done: Months ago Tom arranged to get a wheelchair (not
knowing it would need to go to Lucy) and the UP Team brought it down.
Tom and Victor and I made two ramps – one in the house between two
rooms and one at the front door. I have stayed with Lucy so that
Angelina could accompany her husband and the UP team on some of the
missions work or (before and after the team came) personal errands.
We (UP) paid for a consult with the neurologist and Tom and I
accompanied Lucy and the parents. Elpidio and Angelina are wonderful
people, but they are unequipped to deal with medical concepts or to be
an advocate for Lucy in the medical system, so I am trying to give
some assistance in those areas. Please pray for them as I will be
here only a short time longer. (One day's example will show you what
I mean: They were not going to "bother" Lucy with a trip to the
doctor as they thought they could just talk with the neurologist, but
of course the neurologist needed to see Lucy as it had been more than
3 months and her condition has deteriorated substantially. Thank God
I asked that Lucy come, because he changed his diagnosis upon seeing
her. Elpidio is nearly deaf and could not hear the doctor and
Angelina could not understand or remember the medical terminology; I
had to explain it when we came back to the house. In their effort to
protect Lucy, and with the best of intentions, they leave her out of
things, not realizing how that strips her of power when she already
feels powerless. When we came back to the house to discuss what the
doctor had said and what the next steps should be, they were going to
send Lucy to bed, but I invited Lucy to participate and when she said
she wanted to, they were completely open. They love her and are
sacrificing daily to help her, but this is new territory for them.
Watching Angelina with Lucy made me remember how beautifully and
unselfishly my own mother cared for me after surgeries and through
health crises and watching this family made me so grateful to have
parents with the capability and resources to better navigate the
medical system and to be advocates for me when I needed them. It is
not an easy thing.)

What the neurologist said: Given Lucy's deterioration and symptoms,
he suspects multiple sclerosis. He said it is necessary to rule out a
tumor or other possible diseases, but this is his best guess. He also
said MS is very rare here (much more common in the U.S. for some
reason) and many doctors do not know how to diagnose or treat it.
There were two options. One was to go to Puebla and the other to
Mexico City. Puebla would have involved some private doctors and
Mexico City involved the state system. I was leaning toward the
private doctors, but he explained that 1) in Mexico City there is a
hospital with 70 specialists, and 2) that we would use up all the
money with one test in Puebla, and there will be a need for follow-up
tests, all of which they can do in one trip to Mexico City for a more
reasonable cost.

What we'll be doing in the coming week: The team left yesterday and
Tom and I were planning to leave on Monday, but we're going to stay
through the end of next week to help out with various things. We are
helping to navigate the medical system. (We had to go back to get a
paper for an appointment on Monday at which time we'll get a paper
that will allow us to call Mexico City for an appointment. And we are
praying that we'll be able to get an appointment in Mexico City
(please pray with us!) for Tuesday or Wednesday, because we'll need to
be there a few days and have time to drive back. Angelina has asked
me to make various medical phone calls for her, despite the fact that
her Spanish is obviously fluent and mine is not. Elpidio cannot drive
that distance (and Angelina doesn't drive), so Tom and I are going to
take them (8 hour drive?) to Mexico City if the appointment can be
made in time. Their vehicle may not make the drive without some
repairs (we checked into rental cars and flights and repairing their
vehicle is the cheapest option; Lucy cannot take a bus because she
needs frequent stops), so Tom and Elpidio are getting estimates for
repairs. They are also fixing the seatbelts (something we asked for
and which, lucky for us, turns out to be the law in Mexico City).
Today we also had an estimate for hand rails where it is impossible to
put a ramp. If someone is behind her and she has hand rails, she will
be able to navigate the two steps to the bedroom. Tom talked the guy
down from an estimate of 1450 pesos to 750 pesos. And we need to make
some repairs to the ramps we did make, including making the entry ramp
an easier grade. Miraculously, Lucy was finally able to have her
first physical therapy appointment yesterday, and Angelina has asked
me to accompany them to the next appointment to help her write down
and illustrate the home exercises. If all goes well, we will go to
physical therapy Monday at 10am, to the neurologist at noon, do the
final car repairs, then head to Mexico City.

In Mexico City, we hope also to find a specialist who can help Elpidio
and maybe get better hearing aids. The ones he has are not working
well enough and his hearing is getting worse. We are hopeful that if
he can HEAR the doctors, he can help to be an advocate for Lucy, plus
communication is vital to his work and calling and it has been very
difficult for him personally to suffer such hearing loss.

Rebeca also has some health problems, and because hers are less
serious in comparison to her sister's, these have been swept aside, so
we want to send her to the doctor here in Oaxaca as well.

Our UP Team was able to leave 10,500 pesos (about $950), which we will
use first on Lucy. We are not sure if that is going to be enough to
cover Lucy's immediate costs and it is unfortunately clear that she
will need ongoing care and treatment. Tom and I are willing to put in
anything extra needed to make sure all of the above gets done (Lucy's
Mexico City trip and appointments, hopefully an appointment and
hearing aids for Elpidio, and an appointment for Rebeca), but we would
be very grateful if others would help out. And we know they will have
ongoing needs with further treatments that will be more than we can
cover. We can give you information about how to contribute to this
family either through University Praise or through Tecate Mission.
Just let us know if you're willing.

This update is EVEN LONGER THAN USUAL and I have focused on the Perez
family, but I also need to share that we (UP Team) brought a
wheelchair to a woman named Adelberta in Carrizalillo, who is in her
20's and has spent her entire life confined to a bed, and provided
money for ramps. I also need to share that there is also a 15-year
old girl near there who was struck with the same symptoms as Lucy at
the same time, and we told her brother (who happened to be our driver)
we would do everything we could to get more information and some funds
to help them. We are also hoping for another two wheelchairs, one for
this young girl and one for Isiasis's father.

When we returned from the mountains, we heard the heart-wrenching news
of the tsunamis and its victims. Hearing that and seeing the needs in
front of my face serve as a reminder that we who are blessed with
health (or relative health in our case) and with financial and other
resources need to count our blessings and always look for ways to help
those less fortunate than we. We never have to look far; there is so
much need.

God bless,

Ronit and Tom Ricoy

¶ 10:17 PM